![]() Proverbs 6:16-19 - These six things doth the LORD hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him: (Read More.) Proverbs 29:22 - An angry man stirreth up strife, and a furious man aboundeth in transgression. Proverbs 20:3 - It is an honour for a man to cease from strife: but every fool will be meddling. Galatians 5:19-21 - Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, (Read More.) James 3:14-16 - But if ye have bitter envying and strife in your hearts, glory not, and lie not against the truth. ![]() Proverbs 16:28 - A froward man soweth strife: and a whisperer separateth chief friends. Proverbs 10:12 - Hatred stirreth up strifes: but love covereth all sins. For it is only in facing challenges and problems that we can find out our true selves and just what we are capable of being and doing.2 Timothy 2:23-25 - But foolish and unlearned questions avoid, knowing that they do gender strifes. When you find yourself stressing over how things work or how you are, remind yourself that this stress or strife is simply a source of energy that makes life worthwhile. The meaning of strife can be seen then as the anger we have toward how things are and is the very motivation that drives us to grow, change, evolve and make a difference to the world. What we also must realise is that it is these very struggles against the way the world is and the way we are that gives us something to react to. Furthermore, our identity: the beliefs and stories we tell ourselves about who we are must remain consistent so the changes we wish to make must fit perfectly with these narratives. We have to show ourselves that we are ready for every eventuality and we have to provide ourselves with sufficient motivation and tools to continue the new way of acting. Often we vow to change something over lent or a New Year’s resolution but actual long-term behavioural change involves far more than simply a decision. This is not easy but the mere knowledge that it is not as simple as just deciding to make a change is critical. So again the key involves influencing myself into accepting long-term changes which will keep me safe, keep life easy while also helping me to grow. What I want is to grow and develop and take the necessary actions that will help me transform so that I can become more like the person I want to be. Our brains use as little energy as possible and our bodies like to do whatever they can do to survive which involves keeping things the same as much as it can. With regard to my relationship with myself, the strife of not being how I want to be is best dealt with by understanding that we tend to like a sense of stability or balance. It is to understand the priorities of what I most care about and commit some of my time to doing whatever I can about whatever I can. The answer to a successful negotiation is to accept what I cannot control and what I can control and what I can influence. What I want is to influence the world to be more as I want it to be. I always start with asking what does the other person want? In the case of the world, the world wants to just be what it is and continue to act as it does. So how does one do this? Well the key exists in understanding your own position and the other position and finding a win win solution. In the context of strife this could mean mediating or negotiating with myself better. If I was to sum up what I do, it would be to teach people to influence themselves and others better. We could call these two types of strife, internal and external. How I wish I would be and how I actually behave are also sometimes in stark disagreement. Furthermore, such disagreement is not limited to the world. In many ways this is a form of bitter disagreement that leads to stress. Whenever I get stressed it is often because I feel frustrated with the gap between how I wish things would be and how they actually are. Strife means bitter conflict of some form. The word strife is rarely mentioned but yet is as important to the challenges we face as stress. Inundated with worries and fears about the problems that stalk us, we find ourselves needing to handle a massive amount of stress. We find ourselves locked in a world of endless attention grabbing. The fast paced world we live in brings more stress than ever.
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